Cycle 3: Week 1, Day 8

9:23am
Weak. So very weak. Had to hunch over and will myself to make my shake this morning. Feel drained. Not sure how I will get all the way to the lab from the parking lot today. Chemo again tomorrow. Just so weak. Ugh.

Trusting that the protein shake will give me some energy.

11:56am
Back from lab, that was hard work... felt sick in my chest from the long walk.  Made it.  Yay.  Home again, Mom warmed up some yummy soup for me from a friend, then tv time on the couch.   Feeling a little more energy for having eaten and am trying to keep my liquid intake up today because the pharmacist saw us in the elevator (and remembered us!... think how many patients they see, the BCCA staff really is amazing!), asked how I was feeling, I said, "weak today" and she said, "drink lots."  So I will.

Been thinking on our "lungs are clear" news from Saturday.  Can't stop thinking of it, actually.  I can feel a lightened-heart feeling from my loved ones.  My kids couldn't stop talking about it amongst themselves all day Sunday... "did you hear that Mommy's cancer is out of her lungs?" ... "did you hear about the miracle of Mommys' cancer is gone?"... and "Hey, do we get to go to Disneyworld today?" cuz that's the promise for when we get to cured/remission.  For me, I find it harder to be pleasant about working through the chemo side effects now that I know it's working.  Crazy, right?  Chemo is hardwork... I am lazy.  I'd rather just be done now, you know?!  My prayers have increased for cancer patients and people with long-term disease and difficulties... as I have said from the beginning, stamina is a constant prayer request of mine.

5:45pm
Had a solid two hour sleep this afternoon, kept up with small meals and lots of fluids, feeling less exhausted...until I try and do something.  Made cheese sauce for the broccoli (the broccoli and cauliflower from the veggie tray needed to be used up) and standing for that few minutes gave me some chest discomfort...like I had just run a marathon (hilarious... run... even in my real life I'm not a runner, lol).  So, so long as I sit on my butt and do a whole lot of nothing, I am feeling stronger than this morning.   Yay!  Definitely having hair loss today. 

Update on the swelling of Saturday night:  In the excitment of the "NOTHING" and clear lung x-rays, I didn't update you all on the swollen neck and reason for going to emergency in the first place.  The emergency doctor wasn't concerned, he said my "anti-inflammatory numbers are good" which I take to mean "everything is working as it should.  His advice was to go home and get some sleep, which is what we did.  My last chemo was in hospital under strange circumstances, but Mom remembers me having a day or two where my neck swelled a little... I'm guessing that the stiff muscles across my neck and the bit of swollen neck is chemo side effects.  I will tell my oncologist when I see her next.