What a weird week it has been. My port is much better these eight days after insertion. For some reason the port, which is on the cancer shoulder side, has exacerbated the droning pain that the radiation had finally taken away but it is not nearly as bad... Sort of a dull burning. My lungs are worse these days, I would greatly appreciate prayers for healing and good breathing and calming of the coughing. When I wake and sit up it is about an hour of coughing and clearing my lungs. The coughing is actually to a full gag that panics me that I might actually throw up. So grateful that its only two or three big gags before that settles down. It's just strange. I am sleeping 11 and 12 hours as my "night", trusting my body is using those sleep hours for good!
Tonight I am finding myself very short-tempered. Eek. Not sure what's up, best to keep my mouth shut and myself on the sidelines. Emotions are up and down this week, for the most part I'm okay and not any one big panic or sad or angry or anything... In fact I feel fairly mellow so not sure where the random flows of tears come from. Wondering if I am having some flu shot symptoms with the tired and the achy and such. Who knows. Anything can be cancer or 40 or tired or life.
M is at a sleepover with a BFF and its just me and the menfolk. Friday TV for sure!
Chemo on Tuesday.
It's ok to feel all these thing. That's "normal", for cancer. It's been 11 years on chemo for me, and I still break down and cry from time to time. The best part (if there is one), about chemo, is the awkward situations you can get out of! A couple of months ago, I had just done chemo, and had to run to the store for some essentials we were out of. Was doing the speed limit thru a school zone, when "Officer Hot Shot" pulled me over. He asked for all my info, and I told him I had just had chemo. I bent over to get the "papers" from the glove box. I had a wave of nausea on my way back up. He told me my tail light was out. I told HIM I was about to barf. I threw up OUT the window, all over his pants and shoes. He told me to have a nice day! LOL! Use the "cancer card" when you need/want to :) ~Barb Stingl www.cancerhasitspriviliges.blogspot.ca
ReplyDelete